I’m feeling drunk after one glass of wine thanks to not drinking in ages and lack of food and sleep.
I shouldn’t be bogging but fuck it. It hurts. It hurts so bloody bad.
I just got asked at a party if I was expecting. Um hello?! Glass of wine in hand, See!!!!
No. I’m not. M is enough for us for now.
No I’m definitely not. No we aren’t trying. Excuse me please I need to pop to the ladies.

But I could have been.
I could be nervous about my due date tomorrow.
I could be going nuts as the contractions were getting intense.
I could have been getting ready to welcome a new addition to our family.
I could have. I wish I was. I’m braking. I’m upset beyond. My heart aches for the could have beens and the already wished for.


One thought on “

  1. Felt compelled to write having been through it myself 7 years ago. It feels like you are expected to move on quickly, but in reality, it stays there for a long time. Over time, the grief lessens but you never forget.
    People are insensitive at the best of time – that was a very poorly timed crap comment. I hope you have a lot of support with friends and family at the mo.

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